Dreams

Many people believe that our dreams show us what is in our subconscious. Things that sometimes we are either unwilling to admit we desire, or things that we thought were resolved. I recently had a dream that made me realize that I have missed out on something I once assumed I would have. Over the years I had come to terms with the fact that due to certain situations beyond my control I would never have everything I once desired. Not getting everything I once wanted used to bother me, but I had long ago realized that it is really for the best, and I was okay with this and have become content.
I am not one to usually give up on something I truly want, but I am accustomed to compromise. Too often people give up on their dreams and don't fight for what their heart really wants. My dream reminded me though that I have compromised long enough, and if I still truly desire something it is possible again, if I am willing to work for it. All worthy dreams are work, but worth the work. What my dream was about is not what is important to this post. What I am trying to express in this post is that people should not give up on dreams. Dreams are important to a person's happiness and what is truly in someone's heart. Giving up on your dreams can make you bitter and resentful. While some people seem to thrive on unhappiness, I am betting that most people would prefer a happy, peaceful and loving life.
Now that i have again admitted that I once had a dream here is something I must do about it. I don't really believe in new years resolutions, mostly because people make them and then don't follow through with them. This year, however, I would like to make a life resolution to always attempt to follow my dreams and do my best to make my dreams come true. I am also not going to wait until January first to start working on my dream, or planning out how I need to go about achieving this long lost dream.
Now in the spirit of the season, I wish everyone happy holidays, merry Christmas, happy Chanukah, kwanza, Yule, and any other holiday that you practice this time of year if I forgot one. Please remember to treat each other with respect, especially yourself. It is important to always give attention to your own desires, wishes, and needs, especially during the holidays.

Marshmallowy Goodness

It occurs to me that I have not posted to my blog since before Halloween.  Halloween did not seem as big a deal this year as it was last year.  There was no mob about, just a few families here and there.  We brought home way to much candy, but we always do, and there were no other green lanterns out. 

Now that Halloween is over, my food focus has switched to thanksgiving and Christmas.  I work every thanksgiving, so I don't usually stress having to have a big meal, but I do try and have a small "thanksgiving" meal with my family on a day other than thanksgiving.  This meal usually consists of ham, green bean casserole and sweet potato casserole, not exactly the healthiest of meals.  With my new year of weight-loss, however, I'm sure I can make it healthier, at least the green bean and sweet potato casseroles.  I will post the recipes to the recipe page.  For the green been casserole it is simply a matter of changing ingredients, but for the sweet potato casserole, I have actually found a baked sweet potato recipe that puts the casserole inside the potato skin.  I have already tried this recipe and I can say confidently that it is the best substitute for someone that is watching their weight, but still wants to join in the eating fun of the holidays. 

Maybe it is because I have only ever eaten sweet potatoes in the traditional sugary, buttery, marshmallowy casserole that is standard fare for thanksgiving and Christmas, but I never knew sweet potatoes helped in digestion.  A sweet potato, even though called a potato, is more like a squash.  It has the vitamin and mineral content that you can find in a fall and winter squash, like pumpkin and acorn squash, without the super starch content of a regular white potato.  After eating the twice baked sweet potatoes I did not have the usual lump in the gut feeling I get after eating the sweet potato casserole with all of its greasy sugary goodness.  So look at my recipe page and try the potatoes in place of the casserole for a healthier thanksgiving and Christmas.  If you feel a need to have the marshmallows then put a few on top, but try to resist because they are healthier without.  Sweet potatoes really do have a wonderful flavor all their own, but too many people miss out on it because they load them down with junk every year.

Halloween Fun

What is it about Halloween that makes us all want to act like children with an inappropriate button? I'm sure Freud would have something to say regarding our true inner feelings and how we only feel secure enough to express them during Halloween because we know we will not be judged by the others that stepped out of the closet for the day as well.

On my way home from work the other day I drove down the strip and saw a parade of costumed individuals. Among them Gumby, Santa, a group of scantily clad girls that would be mistaken for street walkers on any other day of the year, and a gaggle of fairy boys. These fairy boys were not the kind you would find in your garden, but the kind with frilly tutus and ballet shoes. It occurred to me at this point that this is the one day of the year when we feel free to express ourselves without worrying about whether or not we are conforming to the latest fashions or ideals. We act unusual and crazy, the crazier sometimes the better, because we are given the mask of Halloween. I put on my mask on Halloween and I can be any character I want and play any part that I want. Tomorrow life will go back to normal, but it doesn't matter because anything that happens on Halloween is instantly transformed into an awesome experience due to its association with Halloween. Any discussions about the costumes or the persona taken on by an individual during Halloween usually involve the world "cool." There is no judgement here.

Last year I went out as Harley Quinn, Joker's girlfriend that wears a red and black striped kind of jester circus costume. During the last half of our trick-or-treat walk we noticed that a guy walking the same route was also in a red and black striped costume that looked like an evil jester. I wonder if this year there will be any other green lanterns? I would not be surprised since the movie was recently released.

Halloween is the best holiday ever.

Children Left Behind

Test #3 is coming up this next Monday for my biology class. I plan on getting another A of course, but I find myself losing steam quicker than during the past semesters. I am not losing the desire to go after my nursing degree, but I am waiting for the day that this semester ends. I am going to blame it on my communications class. I am enjoying my communications class and have 100% in the class, so it isn't like I'm disappointed in my grade. I do, however, have a disappointment in our nation's educational system. I am part of generation X, so some of my knowledge does follow along the lines of "old school." It seems that since I was in high school the knowledge that kids enter into college with has diminished, by quite a bit.

I have a group project due in my communications class that requires that all members write a portion of the paper. This has led me to the conclusion that 2 of my group members are about 2 steps away from being illiterate. How does this benefit the student, much less society, if we allow our children to progress in school when they don't even possess the basic skills required to put a sentence together?

A couple of years ago a new rule came out regarding the format used when writing an essay or paper; after a sentence a person no longer has to put two spaces after a period, but can now only put one if they feel like it. The old school rule of two spaces is still accepted, however, the student now has the option of only placing one space. We are teaching our children that if the majority is lazy enough others will give in and the lazy way will become acceptable. Maybe one day Ebonics will be taught as an actual language as well. If you notice I have placed two spaces after everyone of my sentences, unless I made a mistake that my lazy-man's autocorrect did not catch because one space is acceptable. I refuse to give in to the lazy one space, and yes sometimes I even curse my autocorrect feature for not allowing me to fix my own misspelled words. As a nation we should be trying to bring the people to the standard, not the standard to the people (a phrase that I have taken from the growing kids classes).

If a child can not form a proper sentence they should be left behind. If a child can not add two numbers together, regardless of the number of digits, they should be left behind. If a child can not speak in proper sentences and not just the local slang, they should be left behind. This does not require that a child be a genius or prodigy, or even have the ability to get straight A's. This does require, however, that our children have the basic skills necessary to succeed in a growing and progressing world.

So delicious

I suppose it has been long enough since I posted last.  I have been so busy with school that I haven't had much time for anything other than studying.  Between making a million flashcards to get A's on my Biology tests and trying to cope with the fact that more than half of my communications group is illiterate, I haven't had much time to just sit down and relax.  Today is my half relaxation day though.  I have still been doing homework and cleaning, but I feel like I have been able to go at my own pace, with plenty of time left in the day.
 
I'm still sticking with my good eating habits and exercising as much as I can.  A friend and I are even going to a belly dancing class that just started Monday.  I finally made the chicken pot pie casserole that I had been planning.  It turned out pretty good and now we have leftovers for a week now.  I have split pea soup planned again for Thursday because that was too good to go without for long.  While focusing on eating healthy in hopes that I will continue to lose weight I have been wanting dessert, naturally.  There are of course the desserts of fruit that I could eat, like apples sauté in butter with cinnamon and stevia sprinkled on top, but the whole point of me putting my thoughts in these posts is an attempt to discover a new way to cook the same old meals in a healthier way.  I strive for a balance between healthy, yummy, and a variety in all things I eat, this includes desserts.  So my hunt for a healthy dessert took me to the frozen dessert section in the grocery store.  I found the richest ice cream in the world, SO Delicious Coconut Milk ice cream.  Instead of being made with cream it is made with coconut milk, which makes it super creamy and a hint of coconut flavor, but not enough for those that may dislike coconut.  The saturated fat is pretty high, but it is coconut fat instead of animal fat.  Then there is the fact that this ice cream is completely organic.  I have only tried the mint chip and chocolate, but for now those are good enough for me on occasion.  If you are worried about the saturated fat levels then there are always the soy milk versions of this ice cream.

Zumba Fun

So I finally made the chili recipe that I placed on my recipes page and I'm a little disappointed. I usually make my chili from scratch, raw beans and all, but I am trying to plan my menu around foods that are very simple to make in order to keep myself away from foods I shouldn't be eating. The chili turned out more like soup though, but i had also not used pork roast in the past. I normally use lean ground beef that does not add much liquid to the chili, along with the raw beans that absorb any liquid in the pan, while creates a nice thick chili.

The foods that I have added to my menu along with exercising on a daily basis are definitely working for me. I have lost all the pounds that I gained at the Renaissance Faire. Hopefully this weight loss can keep going. Along with my regular exercise routine, I have tried Zumba. I am now a fan. I didn't start with the disc with the steps broken down, but I would recommend that to someone that may have trouble picking up steps quickly. I went straight to one of the 30 min workouts to try it and see if it would become a regular for me. It was definitely easier on my joints than my regular Bollywood workout, which has a fair amount of jumping around. While my heart rate did not elevate as much as it does with the Bollywood workout, I did work up a sweat. I wasn't sure that I got much of a workout until the next day. My back muscles were all kinds of sore, a good sore. Now I may need to go back and forth between the Zumba and the Bollywood workouts as my main cardio. Maybe if I do the 60 min Zumba workout my heart rate will elevate enough for a good cardio workout along with the muscle workout that it gives.

The foods that I have been making have left us with so many leftovers that I haven't had to cook that much lately, but today I am going to make a dish I like to call Bacon and Ham Wrapped Chicken, which I have placed on my recipes page. I would normally make this dish with a side of rice for the sauce that I'd created, but today I am making cauliflower, the healthier choice. I haven't decided what I am making next week, but I am thinking of Crust Less Pot Pie and some more Split Pea Soup. The Crust Less Pot Pie will present a problem. The best part of a pot pie is the buttery flaky crust. I even save the crust for last so that I can savor just the flavor of the crust. My version will probably need to be turned into a casserole with cheese, but I will have to think on it for a bit. Everything is better with cheese.

14

Yesterday was a superb day.  First I took a test in my anatomy and physiology class, which I feel confident about having gotten a pretty good grade in.  This is a very good thing after my last grade not being up to par.  Unfortunately I won't have my grade back until Monday, so in the mean time... Dear test score gods please give me the score that I know I deserve after all the studying I did and the million flash cards I made, thank you I would be forever grateful.

After completing my test I went to my favorite clothing store Lane Bryant to return a pair of pants that were too big and see if I could get find a pair that actually fit.  After losing my 60Lbs. I had been left without a size.  Based off the "skinny" jeans that I had held onto from my previous smaller years I thought I had a good idea of the size a needed.  I bought a couple pairs at Walmart, figuring that I just needed a couple pairs to wear until I was done with my weight-loss.  There is no sense in spending lots of money on a temporary new wardrobe.  The pants I bought at Walmart were WAY to large and no amount of scrunching them up in a belt would make them fit right.  So I fell back on my trusty Lane Bryant.  Since they had never seriously let me down I went off the sizing listed on the website and ordered a couple pairs of jeans.  One was acceptable, but the other, unfortunately, had the same lack of fitting issue as the Walmart jeans.

So I found myself at my favorite clothing store returning a pair of jeans and looking for my current size.  After looking through the store and talking to Pam, the sales lady, I was worried that I had lost too much weight for my favorite store.  I know I should not be disappointed to have lost too much weight for my plus size store, but before I started shopping at Lane Bryant I hated shopping for clothes.  I have always been a curvy girl so finding jeans that fit me from waist to thighs to ankles was almost impossible without a gap in the back and thighs that were a bit snug.  Well after trying on a few pairs of pants, joy once again returned to my day.  I am officially a size 14, which is about 3 sizes down from where I was.  Now I know that the US Size Committee gets together every decade or so and adjusts the measurements on each size so that the "average size" always stays in a specific range.  This is of course due to the unfortunate fact that the average weight of the American population is also increasing per year.  However, I will not deny that my new number is so very pretty.

In celebration of my wonderful day, so I am claiming, my husband treated me to a date at Lucille's BBQ.  I attempted to behave myself with a salad for the main course, but I know I will be suffering for it tomorrow.  I at least have some healthy foods already prepared for me for the next few days to stay on track with trying to behave myself (leftovers).  I am also back on track with my exercise routine, starting with my trusted Bollywood workout last night.

The Faire is Over

Well the faire is now over. Everyone survived and the weather gods fulfilled my request for wonderful weather. I of course ate all the wonderful foods that I planned (meat pies, spiced nuts, and funnel cake) and only gained 1.5lbs. Now I am working my way back into my planned mini menu. This week will be pizza casserole and chili. Since I am making the pizza casserole up as I make it I will have to submit the recipe after I create the dish and let everyone know, whether or not it is worth the time. I'm leaning towards worth it since it will have all the ingredients that I like in my homemade pizza, minus the crust.

I also have to work my way back into my usual work out routine. I didn't do any of my regular workouts for the last few days due to all the walking that I did while we were there. I have found though that when I am put in a situation where my ankles would normally swell up, like walking around in warm weather all day, my full calf boots work like compression socks and reduce the edema caused by me being on my feet all day. I was sure that my boots were going to cause the exact opposite and that I was going to regret wearing them at the end of the day. Once I pulled my boots off though, yes it was an "aaahhh" moment because my legs were hot and sweaty, but I did not have that tight swollen calf feeling that I was expecting. This is good news though since I got the boots to wear with my green lantern Halloween costume and I can't imagine that swelling in spandex would be fun.

So all in all the faire was a fun experience. I ate more than I should have, spent more than I should have, and the fact that the new venue is much bigger than the previous space caused me to walk more than I figured I would. The only downside is that given the fact that the venue was so roomy I wish that the people in charge of selling vendor space at the faire had sold much more space. The vendor spots were listed on the website as being sold out, but they could have spread the booths apart, instead of wall to wall, and still had space for more vendors. A bigger variety of shops would have been nice. It seems like everyone this year was selling the same various pieces of garb with a scattering of trinket or art stores mixed in the middle every once in while. Even with the lack of shops, or lack of what could have been, the faire was very nice this year. The space made it very relaxing, as opposed to the normally overcrowded and claustrophobic feeling you normally get when trying to go just 5 ft. For those expecting documentation, don't worry there will be pictures. I will just need a little time since this week is all about studying for my upcoming tests at school.

The Change in Weather

          The count down to the Ren Faire has begun.  I only have to work tonight and then I get to go to the Faire for the weekend.  I know I promised that I would reserve my real cheat days for the faire, but I have had an early cheat.  I went to IHop and had a chicken salad.  I suppose as far as cheats go this one was not so bad.  The chicken was grilled, instead of breaded and fried, however, there was bread involved.  For anyone that has been to IHop, you know that with many of their main course entrees comes a side of garlic toast.  I suppose I could have said no to the garlic toast, and I thought about it, then this would not be considered a cheat day.  I made the mistake, however, of inhaling after seeing the crispy golden outside of the bread.  Not only did this piece of toast smell wonderful, I'm pretty sure it was the best piece of garlic toast in the world.  It had the perfect garlic:butter:crispy ratio.  I now have to avoid IHop at all costs for a while, at least until I can get the thought of garlic toast out of my head.  I guess I will have to start thinking about my faire cheat... Meat Pies, Spiced Nuts and Funnel Cakes oh my...

            The food cheat aside, this has been a very unusual Las Vegas day.  Normally in October the weather is not even contemplating a cold spell.  We would be lucky to not still be in the 100*F range, however, this year it seems as if the triple digits is the last thing on the weather's mind.  Is the world tilting on its axis, or is it just flipping around so that North America is heading for the section designated for below the equator?  Are we trading places with Australia, causing the changing of the years to be marked by summer instead of winter?  This of course begs the question, are we closer to the next ice age than many of us are willing to admit?  Start stocking up on your supplies and cold weather gear and if you know someone with an old war bunker, or fallout shelter, now would be the time to become best fiends with them.  Whenever the next ice age comes it had better not be coming during the Renaissance Faire because I have plans weather and you a not a part of them.  I would like to make a request of the weather gods, however.  If you could please make sure that the Ren Faire is not subject to weather that is too hot, too cold, or too wet, then I would be eternally grateful.

Sincerely,

An Avid Weather Lover

Meat Pies, Spiced Nuts and Funnel Cakes Oh My...

I have been completely enjoying my homemade split pea soup.  Unfortunately I am going to have the last bowl today.  Next I will be enjoying my homemade spaghetti.  I wonder if i can make a crustless pizza this next week along with the chili I already have planned.  It would probably end up being more of a casserole, but what isn't to like about a casserole topped with cheese.  I love veggies on my pizza so it could turn out to be a super healthy "pizza." 

            If it weren't for the desire to have sugar and a sandwich with mayo, then there would be no temptations what so ever.  I have found, after following the HCG diet, that bread is not so much on my list of cravings, however, I miss the spreads or sauces that go with many breads.  Mayonnaise, jam, peanut butter, and probably anything else that you can spread on a piece of toast or a sandwich.  I just have to keep reminding myself of the Green Lantern costume that I am planning on wearing for Halloween.  I have already bought my costume so my ego will not allow me to change my mind.

            My little guy is looking forward to this coming Halloween.  He is going to be batman with a huge muscle chest and a molded gold utility belt.  The costume is a bit long for him, but we can deal with that.  October is definitely the month for us to dress up and play.  This weekend we are going to the Renaissance Faire in full faire garb.  Little man is so excited about the faire that whenever we even say the word faire he is caught running into the room asking if we are going tonight.  I think every time I have to tell him that it is not until this weekend he gets a little sad.  Of course it doesn't help that he has a minor cold and he was informed today that if he still has his cold on Friday then we will have to stay home.  We are anticipating the faire so much that the next few days are going to be like Christmas.  I only have to work two days this week before I take the days off for the faire.

            The days for the faire are going to be my cheat days for the week.  I will not have problems keeping up with my exercise since there will be a lot of walking around since the venue for the faire this year is suppose to be fairly large.  My diet, however, will suffer a bit.  I will have to report back on exactly how bad the results are, and whether or not I have gained any weight.  Meat Pies, Spiced Nuts and Funnel Cakes oh my... Meat Pies, Spiced Nuts and Funnel Cakes oh my...

Mini Menu

In trying to stick to a low-bad-carb diet I have planned out a mini menu for the next week or so.  I say bad carbs because many people are under the impression that either all carbs are bad, or what they think of as carbs, or if something has a magic word in the title that it automatically becomes an acceptable food to eat, like natural or whole wheat.  A bad carb is basically any carb that your body can not use as long term or sustainable energy, but instead turns the carb into a fat to sit in a part of your body that you don't want it to be.  Natural and whole wheat when shopping in a regular grocery store tend to be misnomers.   Always read the ingredients on the food that you buy because there may be a hidden ingredient that either isn't so natural, or the ingredient is not what it was when it was harvested.  Whole wheat bread that says enriched flour in the ingredients means that the flour was stripped of everything that was good in it when it was plucked from the ground, then the bakers of the bread decided to "enrich" the flour with the vitamins that they originally took out of it.

Now back to my mini menu for the next week.  I am making Split Pea Soup, Italian Sausage Spaghetti, and Chili.  For many people I am sure that all of these recipes could be turned into bad-carb meals, however, I am either doing without or I am substituting my bad-carb with something that is much healthier for me.  As difficult as it is for me, I am going without the crackers and extreme amounts of salt that I would normally add to my split pea soup.  When I make chili I am doing without the cornbread, or for some of us that grew up with a different side to a bowl of chili, a cinnamon roll.  For those of you who are sticking your nose up at the thought of a cinnamon roll with chili just try it next time you have chili.  The sweet and salty, or spicy, go hand in hand.  If you aren't the best of bakers then buy some rolls from Cinnabon, you will never look at a bowl of chili the same way.  Last my spaghetti is not exactly low fat, due to the addition of the Italian sausage, but I can make it low carb by substituting spaghetti squash for the spaghetti noodles that I would normally use.  Yes there are better types of pasta out there, like brown rice pasta, but the spaghetti squash has not been altered and turned into a intestinal glue that keeps your body from flushing out the bad junk.

In addition to trying to keep my eating habits in check, I have also been very obsessed with my exercise routine.  Right now I am doing some form of cardio every day with some weights mixed in for various areas of my body.  Since I started my weight loss journey at the beginning of the year I have lost 60lbs and several inches from head to toe.  While I am very pleased with my progress I feel like I have hit a wall when it comes to toning and minimizing certain areas of my body, specifically my legs.  As much as I work out my legs my "knee fat" doesn't seem to be going anywhere.  If anyone has a new workout that maybe I haven't tried yet, please share with me.

For the next month I am hoping to lose more weight, but if I don't I would at least like to tone down some more.  Halloween is coming and I have decided to be the green lantern (female version).  This is of course a spandex costume, normally a dangerous decision for someone that still needs to lose 40lbs, but being 60lbs lighter than this time last year has given me the confidence to put on a spandex jump suit and walk around the neighborhood for all to see.

My Pledge to My Fans

•   I promise to always try my hardest when my will power is wavering

•   I promise that at some point I will want to cheat and will give in to my cravings at least once in a while. (after all I am only human)

•   I promise that I will try and motivate those in my same predicament.

First day continued

So I am convinced that the weather is not sure what it is suppose to be doing. I left school earlier and it was close to 90 degrees, now it is closer to 70 and raining. I'm not complaining, I love rainy and colder weather, it is just weird.

Mondays are always so difficult for me. I get almost no sleep and I have to be up all day so that I can go to my classes all day. This semester I am only taking communications and anatomy and physiology II, but it seems like I always have studying to do. I am crossing my fingers for A's in both classes though.

Now that I have stopped following the HCG diet I am working more on maintaining my healthy eating habits and starting to get more workouts into my week. Lately I have become obsessed with my Bhangra bounce exercise video, which is Bollywood dancing for anyone that doesn't know. I have found that this exercise is so much fun that I can complete about 40 min of exercise without feeling like I have exercised. I certainly feel it the next day, but not feeling immediately tired and sore has definitely helped me stay with my exercise plan.

First Day

This is my first day of blogging.  I am hoping to gather some knowledge along the way that will help me on my journey.  I have entered a new chapter in my life, which I hope goes well.  Since the beggining of the year I have lost 60lbs.  I still need to lose 30-40 more, but it is going to be slow going from here on out.  It seems the closer I get to my goal weight the harder I have to work to lose each pound.  Of course lately I have not been that motivated.  I keep wanting to eat things that are not on my approved diet.

On top of trying to lose weight I have started a new path that will hopefully lead me into a new career.  I am currently working towards a nursing degree in order to get out of my oh so wonderful dead end career.  If I can continue the full time schedule I have now I should be able to graduate by 2015.  That sounds so far away, but I have a strong motivation to get out of where I am.